Whose Life Are You Living?

October 31st, 2007 | by Jeniffer |

Is the life you are living one of your own design? Or are you one of the many people out there who live their lives according to the wants, needs, and desires of others?

Do you even know what it is you want your life to be like?

Here are some questions to ask yourself now, to discover whose life you are really living.

1) What did you enjoy doing when you were a child? Do you do any of those things now? If not, why not?

2) Again when you were a child, what was it you wanted to be when you grew up? Is it what you are doing now? Would you want to be that now? Was it a realistic desire or dream?

3) What did your parents want you to be when you grew up? Was it the same thing you wanted for yourself? Are you doing what they wanted you to do? If so, does it make you happy?

4) What did your friends tell you you should do while you were growing up? Did you take their advice? Was it in line with who you truly were, or was it something which would allow you to fit in with the crowd?

5) What did people you became romantically involved with want you to be? Did you change some aspect of yourself for them? Were you happy with that change, and did you keep to it if you broke the relationship off? Why or why not?

6) Do you feel as though, even though you are successful in the eyes of the people in your life now, somehow there is some part of yourself that is restless or lacking something? If so, what do you think it is that is missing? Is there a way you can acquire it, or incorporate it into your life? Would it make you happy and/or fulfilled to do so?

7)Do you feel as though the only thing lacking from your life, is you?

8 ) Do you feel as though you have lost your sense of who you are? Your sense of self appreciation, respect, or value?

9)Is your job or the work you do in line with your values? Are the other areas of your life?

10) In your professional life, do you feel a sense of personal integrity? Are you proud of your work? Do you drag yourself to work every day, or is it something to which you look forward?

11) Is there room for growth in you current position? Would you accept it if a promotion was offered? If not, why not? If yes, why–for material reasons only, or because it is something you would see as important to your life, to the self that you are?

Often, people go through their lives listening to the voice of others, rather than the voice inside of themselves.

We all know the voices:

You should do well at that, you father did.

Why wouldn’t you want to be a doctor? Aunt Esther’s son became a doctor!

You should be a model.

Etc.

While feedback about your skills and abilities can produce insight into a possible future, it is never the only future.

And often people’s view of what you should be does not line up with your own.

So sit for a moment.

Be still.

Be quiet.

Think.